Conversations: Life lived well !

Over past few years, we had a rare moment of meeting and speaking to several senior members of my family and friends to talk about their personal and professional lives! Let me share some highlights of a few conversations which is their valuable perspectives.

All of them were proud to have lived a very happy, contented and accomplished life; they were happy to share their journey, their experiences, joy, tribulations, and success. 

Their message was loud and clear on what mattered to them during their life journey and that they still had a long way to go!  Life well lived, time well spent on bettering the future, and savouring every moment is what mattered the most.


Living went beyond material possessions and legacy. Initial years of his life were invested to insure financial security and comforts for themselves and the family were well founded and justified however what mattered to them over long run went beyond material possessions and a reputation! 

It did not matter what and how much they had at the end of retirement - neither were they bothered about success or failures or the ups and downs - what mattered is whether they enjoyed every moment, whether they made an impact on the lives of others, whether they left a good legacy and build friends. 

They believed that the law of averages and mean reversal on personal net present value (NPV) or net worth at end of career catches up to everyone as there is limit to everything; everyone cannot be Bill nor an Albert. For example in 2012, the estimated average career  (n=30) pay NPV of a Harvard MBA or a PhD was about $3.9 million and an average of elite schools is $3.0 million; an average NPV of a high flying executive would be about US$10 million. In their view, there were either steady careers that paid annuity or careers with bouts of big bonuses with early burnouts; either choice reverts to means so individuals needs to be prepared mentally to live up to career challenges. These valuations could be achieved by most above average professionals and entrepreneurs with focus, determination, perseverance, smart investing and a well managed inheritance. A good measured life with an average NPV is what mattered; a volatile earning flow on a very high demanding investment job or a showman may require major sacrifices on the health, family, personal life and friends. 

On failure and adversities and the social noise, most agreed that Asian society is less forgiving to failures and adversities, ignore the noise but always listen to what is helpful so there is something to learn. They thought that oneself and his family family are alone to battle the odds; you though can draw only on your best friends. Focus, perseverance, patience, hard work, skills developed and experience that is put to good use, and your reputation will only help you succeed. 

Without any regrets, they all admitted that they made a lot of mistakes in his journey but treated mistakes like a teacher to bounce back! With humility they also sincerely apologized to people that may have been hurt knowingly or unknowingly or those they could not help nor could not understand their needs. 

All of them had an unwritten code of conduct, ethics and honour which insured their personal reputation and goodwill! Their virtues, beliefs and piousness was tuned to the good of human and environment! 

Some key personal mantras that they shared:

• Find and live for a passion; be curious and optimist to unravel, learn and unlearn. Live everyday as it comes and as if it was last!

• Aim for the best and never give up. Life is a long journey, few downs or hiccups should not matter; at every stage learn and unlearn as it just makes us better and better. 

• Work hard, play hard, invest your best to whatever needs to be done - rewards will come! 

• Do not be afraid of mistakes or adversities - they are the best teacher. Even during a downturn, keep up your confidence, you head high and a smiling face for time is the best healer, patience is a virtue!

• Insure happiness and comforts for the family for a good, happy and healthy life. You do not have to provide everything for your children as children will always be smarter, intelligent, and hard working. Ensure that we impart values; they will put this concoction to best use for themselves and contribute to the society as we have been doing. 

• Family and friends first - don't lose them for a career. We all can find work and settle down easily for a comfortable life; building family take time and investment. Work life balance is an illusion - it just about making smart choices. 

• Everything happens for a reason, trust that everything will be alright or you will make it alright! Luck does play a role so make yourself available at the right time, place and for right people makes a lot of difference in success and failure.

• Make an impact on others life! Everyone has a unspoken mentor or received help that made some impact on their lives!  Pay it forward. Ensure that you shower gratitude, be humble and kind to others. A small nudge or a good gesture and advice could help make an impact on others life. Help others succeed, always be part of their joy and happiness. Do whatever is best possible! 

• Leave a legacy; leave a positive impact on the family, society, and environment.

• Be honest to yourself and people around you; follow through your commitments.

• Integrity, reputation and personal goodwill are valuable assets; guard them at all cost.

• Health is wealth and they could have managed this even better.

On post retirement life they said, 'the best is yet to be'. They look forward to a healthy, carefree life, a new professional journey that can help themselves create new dimension in their life!

These senior members of the family had the privilege to be born into a respectable family and had humble beginning. These individuals had an accomplished professional and personal life, they all have travelled globally, and have helped build business, careers and families, engaged local communities and contributed positively to the environment all of which helped them to build a strong personal equity. 

One of the senior created a corporate corpus to help his colleagues and ex-colleagues that met with fatality or were handicapped while working in company factories or office and their families. Another helped plant trees to rehab forests and create a wave of social awareness for environment. All of them have discretely funded educational institutions that focus on educating village girls, fund vocational institutes in emerging markets and made personal and discrete contributions to their extended families and colleagues that were in distress.

 Kudos to these seniors that have lived well and have shared their personal memories and experiences!